Monday, March 30, 2009

How Do We Get It All Done?

Welcome to Tappe Talk, a Purposed Connection podcast by The Tappe Group. How overwhelming has your week been? Sometimes we have too much to do and feel we have little time to do it. So, how do you get it all done? Allen gives us his thoughts on a process that works.

  1. Be thankful
  2. Be motivated
  3. Be Reasonable
  4. Be Wise
  5. Be Disciplined
  6. Be Committed
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Wednesday, March 25, 2009

"What Can't You Change?"

My guess is that the greatest challenge in your life revolves around some life dynamic you have no ability to change. So, how do you feel about it? No, this is not meant to be some "blog therapy" session. You just need to stay in touch with where your energy is going because it is going somewhere. If you can't change it, then it is frustrating you in one of two ways. You are either frustrated with yourself and so you are doing damage to yourself, or you are letting yourself transfer that frustration to someone else and so you are doing damage to some other relationship. It just works that way.



Changing things you have the ability to change is hard enough. Eating less or eating more healthy seems to occupy a lot of conversation in our lives. Exercising more or beginning that exercise program you know you need in your life is another conversation. For some it is overcoming a habit that has yet to reach addiction stage, like spending too much time on the internet or maybe drinking a little too much. I am not saying any of those things are easy. I am just saying that we have the power to change those things.



Chronic pain won't go away. Responsibility will always be there. Relationships are part of life. Aging is as real as the mirror you have to face. Death and dying for people you love and ultimately for yourself will not go away. So, what do you do? You can try to avoid it. It won't go away. You can get mad. Someone, ultimately you, will get hurt. Or, you can engage it. Spiritually, physically, relationally, and professionally. Take it on. You have been equipped for it. It is not easy. No one ever said life was. You are loved enough to manage it whether you feel like it or not. That is the truth. Blessings.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Life is a Pain...?

Welcome to Tappe Talk, a Purposed Connection podcast by The Tappe Group. We all have some sort of connection to pain. Some things are worse than others, but we all have pain to manage. It really is chronic in all of our lives. Allen gives eight suggestions on how to manage that pain.
  1. You have to Choose
  2. You need to Think Well
  3. You need Support
  4. You need a Reason WHY
  5. You need to Laugh
  6. You need to stay Honest
  7. You need to Celebrate
  8. You need to Keep On

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Peaks and Valleys by Spencer Johnson, M.D.


The Feeling Good Handbook by David D. Burns

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Wednesday, March 18, 2009

How Do You Compare?

Making comparisons is tricky business. On one hand, it can be unsettling and unhealthy. On the other hand, it can break unnecessary shackles that keep you from growing forward to new opportunities.


When I was young I didn't realize I was poor until I met someone who wasn't. I also didn't realize there was anything wrong with it. After that comparative realization, life seemed to get a little more complicated. Appearances took on new importance. I became aware of the fact that patches and tears weren't stylish. My life was never the same in a self-conscious sort of way.


On the other hand, I once thought I was pretty good in tennis. I beat everyone I played. Then, I played someone who taught me that I really wasn't very good at all. He provided me not only an alternative, but a superlative, point of view. My life, and my game, were never the same. For that I will forever be thankful.


So, comparisons are part of our journey. If we use them and they don't use us, then life has a wonderful rhythm. If we let them use us and we don't choose to use them, then life can become a frustrating and fearful experience. The path seems pretty clear to me for now at least. How about you? Blessings.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Choosing to Say No!



Welcome to Tappe Talk, a Purposed Connection podcast by The Tappe Group. Last week, we asked the question "To what or whom will you say yes?" Hopefully you gave the question some consideration. This week Allen looks at the second question, "To what will you say No?"

  1. Say No to being a victim
  2. Say No to judging others
  3. Say No to avoiding conflict
  4. Say No to being dependent
  5. Say No to being negative
  6. Say No to fear

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Wednesday, March 11, 2009

What Are We Saving For?

This week’s financial indicators were released, and they were all negative as expected...except one. The American people are actually saving money. American savings are reported to be up some 5%. It has been more than a quarter of a century since that kind of saving discipline has been reported by the American population. We obviously deserve a round of applause, don’t we? Well, in fact, our timing stinks, and we may need to look closely at our motive before it is too late. Is it really discipline or is it fear?

To begin with, Obama is not going to save us. That is not a political statement. It is a historical statement. FDR did not save us in the late twenties. He managed the spirit of a nation. Obama is doing the same now. The New Deal, as it was called, may have ultimately contributed more to the Depression than it did to cure it. I am certainly not throwing stones at anyone. I have no answers as to how much government is too much government. Those of us who have lived as free enterprise purists have several decades of banking and mortgage embarrassment to digest.
To me, the question still will come back to each of us as individuals. No matter what Washington decides to do, we have to choose what we will do. Do we invest in our future by building businesses and investing in one another or do we save it and bury it for another day? But what other day? What day will we be waiting for?

I am all for cutting out the waste. I have wasted more in my life than I care to share. I have made and am making corrective measures. But, I am not through investing in tomorrow. I am not going to hide from the risk of failure. I don’t think it is the same as a roll of the dice. I believe it is an educated belief in the spirit of this country.

So, I am going to continue to cut expenses. I am going to continue to spend less on wasteful things. And, I hope I then will have opportunity to continue to invest my money and my time in more of the opportunities and people I believe in. Otherwise, what am I saving for?

Monday, March 9, 2009

Choosing to Say Yes!

Welcome to Tappe Talk, a Purposed Connection Podcast by The Tappe Group. Who are you going to say yes to this week? What are you going to say yes to this week? Allen gives six suggestions on what and whom you need to say yes to. Give it a try!

1. Choose to say Yes to God
2. Choose to say Yes to You
3. Choose to say Yes to Your Family
4. Choose to say Yes to Your Team
5. Choose to say Yes to Your Community
6. Choose to say Yes to Your Country

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To have this weekly podcast automatically upload to your mp3 player visit the iTunes Store and Power Search "tappe talk" and then subscribe

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Wednesday, March 4, 2009

"Keeping Expectations Clarified"

What makes relationships so difficult? We assume they won't be. That's the problem from the beginning. We expect relationships to be easy, and they just aren't. They require work. One thing you can always know - anytime there is trouble in a relationship, it always revolves around expectations. Someone is expecting something of the someone else, and they aren't delivering. So, here are a few sugggestions.

Whenever possible, clarify expectations from the beginning. We try to do that with marriage vows, don't we. Now, most of us tend to over state things. We probably think we really mean them, but we don't really know what we're talking about. Still, you get the idea. We try to clarify expectations from the beginning of the marriage. We need to do that in other relationships as well. On the job with customers and colleagues, we need to let people know what we expect. Expectations are more than mere job descriptions. Expectations involve not only what we want people to do in a job but how we want people to do them. It's generally in the how that disappointment comes.

After we've established expectations, we need to keep them clarified. On a regular basis, we need to discuss how we are doing. The longer you're together whether in marriage or on the job the more important it becomes. It's so easy to take each other for granted. Our expectations begin to expand. It happens gradually. And then all of a sudden we become so disappointed. We're upset about what didn't happen that should have. What we don't realize is that most of the time the other person doesn't even know they are supposed to be doing it. I am thinking the best of them for you. Take the time to renew your vows with the important relationships in your life. Talk about it. Review things.

Expectations need to stay clarified. It's not natural. You have to make it happen, as usual, on purpose! Good luck.

Monday, March 2, 2009

Who Is A Professional, Anyway?

Welcome to Tappe Talk, a Purposed Connection Podcast by The Tappe Group. Who determines the definition of a professional? Who is a professional, anyway? Allen discusses seven qualities behind the role of a professional and who the real professionals are.

  1. Value
  2. Respect
  3. Learn
  4. Team
  5. Distinctive
  6. Capacity
  7. Remembered


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