"What Can't You Change?"

My guess is that the greatest challenge in your life revolves around some life dynamic you have no ability to change. So, how do you feel about it? No, this is not meant to be some "blog therapy" session. You just need to stay in touch with where your energy is going because it is going somewhere. If you can't change it, then it is frustrating you in one of two ways. You are either frustrated with yourself and so you are doing damage to yourself, or you are letting yourself transfer that frustration to someone else and so you are doing damage to some other relationship. It just works that way.

Changing things you have the ability to change is hard enough. Eating less or eating more healthy seems to occupy a lot of conversation in our lives. Exercising more or beginning that exercise program you know you need in your life is another conversation. For some it is overcoming a habit that has yet to reach addiction stage, like spending too much time on the internet or maybe drinking a little too much. I am not saying any of those things are easy. I am just saying that we have the power to change those things.

Chronic pain won't go away. Responsibility will always be there. Relationships are part of life. Aging is as real as the mirror you have to face. Death and dying for people you love and ultimately for yourself will not go away. So, what do you do? You can try to avoid it. It won't go away. You can get mad. Someone, ultimately you, will get hurt. Or, you can engage it. Spiritually, physically, relationally, and professionally. Take it on. You have been equipped for it. It is not easy. No one ever said life was. You are loved enough to manage it whether you feel like it or not. That is the truth. Blessings.  

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Why Do You Think?

I once attended a meeting where the speaker made a case to a group of top producing people against thinking. "Just do it" was his message. More specifically, the message was "just do what I tell you to do". Thinking was being discussed as a detriment to productivity. Don't think? Somehow, there seemed to be something significantly contrary about the message. So what do we do?

To begin with, never give up your responsibility for thinking. Thinking is a freedom you never surrender. It is a power that is a fundamental gift we have as human beings. However, undisciplined thinking can become its own kind of bondage. People can use thinking as a means of constant escape. Thinking can be an expression of arrogance which is really an outworking of insecurity. So, in a very real sense, thinking can be a detriment to productivity when it is undisciplined.

So, maybe the message is to discipline what you think. Think less, on purpose. Choose a system to follow. Choose a coach to follow. Choose a message to believe in and move forward in faith. That doesn't sound like not thinking. It sounds like thinking well. It sounds like thinking with conviction. It sounds like thinking as a professional.

I do believe top producing people have to make choices. What to think is one of those choices. Once those choices are made then we don't have to think about it anymore. It's done. There is the context where thinking is out of order. Once you have chosen then don't think. Just do it. Think about it. Do well, my friends.

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Striving for What?

One day I had a long talk with myself. I actually was talking to God. My grandson overheard our conversation. It was about striving in life. I was enjoying a time of exercise and recreation and spiritual renewal and personal reflection all at the same time. It was a beautiful day. It reminded me of what it must have been intended to be in the beginning in the garden, walking and talking with God.

Anyway, the subject of striving came up. Striving in my relationship with Him. Striving to be healthy. Striving in relationships period. Striving in business. And the question He raised was why? I found it interesting because it is usually me doing the "why" thing. This time it was Him. Because of His love and grace, He has taken care of my relationship with Him. I believe that's true. So, why strive for something He has already provided? I was enjoying a good, brisk walk that has been determined by the American Heart Association, Dr. Kenneth Cooper, and virtually every other noted health professional weighing in on the subject to be the best form of cardiovascular exercise. So, why strive harder and for more? I was with my grandson who was chilling and loving me, and he represented a family who loves me, and friends and so why strive so hard to please people so they will like me? And then there was this economic crisis and I was reminded that everything I have has been given to me and so I was full circle back to God and His amazing grace and so why strive so hard for things over which I have never had any real control?

It was quite an afternoon. And, Benjamin, my grandson, slept through it all. He was in the present. In his world, there was no striving. He trusted me completely for his safety and for his journey home. I am sure the little people of the world are covertly placed here to be our leaders if we would only pay attention to them. Benjamin taught me to chill. There is no reason to strive. My Father has it all in control. Enjoy the Present. Peace.

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The Power of Recognition

Understanding the power of recognition is essential to powerfully influencing the world around you. Far from manipulation, recognition is about actively showing respect for the actions of others. By celebrating the value of what you see, you are validating them and the choices they are making. Otherwise, how will they know?

So, what difference does it make? It makes none if you are content with moving through life having limited effect. In reality, the difference you make in this life has less to do with what you do and more about how you celebrate the life performance of others. By recognizing and praising them for what you see, you actually multiply your own effect.

Think about it. While what you value in life is important for you to represent, it is through the encouragement you communicate to others that your influence is actually maximized. It is your influence in the lives of others that makes the difference. Recognition is the key.

All it really takes is active awareness. By staying more aware of the people in your world, you are able to catch them in the act of distinctively representing the very things you value. Your active recognition of their behavior encourages them to keep going. People need to know. They need your validation. They may say they don't but they do. They need your reflection of them as much as you need theirs.

It is not about allowing others to define you or you them. It is about being responsive. It is about giving and receiving feedback. Relationships are about relating. Relating to others involves communicating what you see, hear, and think. Commit to recognizing and applauding the best in others. It is the best way to represent yourself. Do well, my friends.

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